hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
i think i just lost a toe
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
