There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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