we have pet lesbian snakes
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
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