Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
