Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
