I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I'm sobbing to NWA
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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