Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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