i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
