we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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