I have demons in me.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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