fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Randomize
