You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
