i just had sex bonerless
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
