i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Randomize
