how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize