i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
