My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
