omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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