I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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