dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
He uses pillows to masturbate.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
