Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
operation have a gay friend backfired
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
