i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize