I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
