Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
