very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize