This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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