In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
