Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
