ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
