DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
