Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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