I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
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