More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
