This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
