are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I'm at about main and main street
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
