Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
