He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
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