I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
