I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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