I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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