I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
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