Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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