Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My penis needs a shock collar
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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