it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize