You're so nebulous sometimes
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
