Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Randomize