love makes seman taste better
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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