We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize