been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
