we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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