I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
His nipple licking is glorious
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