i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
